Today has just been zombie-like for me, I went through the day in a daze. I can’t put my finger on what exactly is wrong. I am not moody, sad, unhappy or angry. It is just that I feel out of sorts. Maybe I am overthinking things, maybe I am not. Today is the day I feel like telling someone to shove it up their ass but home training won’t allow me do that, so I have to play nice.
I updated my Whatsapp status telling my friends and all who care to know about my mood. A friend responded saying ‘maybe it is ya period’, of course, darl, it is, how did you know? ‘it happens to me also, take something warm and rest’, she said. This should make me feel happy, the fact that my feelings are valid, sadly I am not!
It goes beyond PMS mood swings, it has more to do with an unsettling feeling with the year 2020. I started the year on a very good note. Going back to my goals and achievements for the year, I have been unable to tick any box for an accomplished goal. With the advent of COVID-19, my laid out plans have been put on hold. All goals and achievements for the year 2020 seem unachievable and it seems life is at a standstill. Do I want to really put all the blame on the pandemic or it goes way deeper?
Enough of my sad musings. I was explaining something to a new colleague and I said let me use my site yosxquisite.com.ng as an example and she asked ‘ do you sell clothes’.Then I blushed and told her no. I did not bother to give further information which is unlike me(I love telling everyone and anyone about what I sell, you do not even need to ask before I start reeling off a long list of my products). It seems my tone was not daunting enough, then she went further to ask ‘what do you sell’ Oh lawd, I rolled my eyes and forced the words outta my mouth ‘I sell everything! I sell jewellery, female undergarments, male undergarments, perfume oil, pimples powder… dry ponmo and dry fish. That’s quite a lot! She exclaimed.
She started asking a series of questions which I had no choice but to answer.
Q – How do you balance your job and business?
A – Have I told you guys I am a technical customer service personnel? I was tempted to say ‘Aspire to acquire the desire that you admire. But if in the process you perspire, don’t retire but refire to acquire that desire that you admire’. But the spirit held my tongue and said no, Yetunde, not today. Then I smiled and said I take orders during the week and make personal deliveries (for some of my customers who like to see my beautiful face) or use a delivery company.
Then I switched tables, and started asking the questions.
Q – So I asked her, what do you sell?
A – Nothing at the moment but I am learning fashion designing.
Q – That’s a full-time job.
A – You can’t be in paid employment all your life you know, there comes a time you will want to be a boss of yourself.
We laughed, I shut down my system, closed for the day, and took my much-needed rest with warm water as advised by my friend.